Loneliness to recycle bin...

Though i like friends in my life, but unfortunately i never had a true friend till i found Gombi. I know to have a friend you need to be one. Yes i feel that i am very friendly to people. But always my friends ditched me. So as usual i feel am isolated, no one to share my feelings with.In my childhood till college all friends remained for few days. why it always happens with me. Even my mom knows about the way i had my friends in life and she is also surprised that why are friends so short lived in my life. Why always i get such friends? They are only my friends only when they have some work get done by me. So i feel that the world is so selfish.

Even you may say that i am also like them, approach people only when i need them. But NO, a big NO, i always wanted to be with them, i always craved to be in their groups, but no group never ever accepted me as their part.

Even NOW i find such people around, and i think they are gonna be there till i die. So now i sought of tried getting adjusted to such people around me. But let me tell you its so very difficult to be alone and aloof... thats why i feel i am most of the time sad.

Wherever i went I found myself aloof. Even in the group I am like odd one out. I donno why. Do all feel the same as i do?
I felt the same loneliness even in my in laws place. All of them still treat me the same way, as if am alien, or did something unforgivable. When i feel am right for my deeds and admit doing that. They just do not like me just because am honest, straight forward. I speak on the face whatever i feel about people or them? Is being true is so punishable? Then why are we taught about truth in our schools? and if we have to pay for being truthful so much then why do our parents teach us to be true and honest? Are all these for namesake?

Even in my work place i feel all all alone.... do people do not like me either?Even she shares the same experience as i do.? or am not that adorable to be around? Oh Gosh! this feeling is killing since my childhood.

But I found Gombi when i met her through one of my classmates, when i was already working. She is the only friend i can say is true friend of mine. But as the time passed the distance has just widened. We are unable to meet often, but still share all our feelings and experiences in life. We are kind of birds of same feathers. We do share same kind of thoughts and experiences. Atleast I should be happy that I have such a good friend!

I was just looking for pictures suitable to my topic today that is about loneliness.I happened to collect few images, and finally decided to delete them from my system, and i liked the way the system asked me "are you sure you want send lonliness to recycle bin"? i said YES!.. but its going to be there till i delete it from there forever, or atlest for few days till it automatically vanishes from recycle bin... :)