Enjoyable Weekend!

On Friday evening itself I started to chalk out my work. I told him to take me to bank first to get my accounts transferred to the new branch near my house for the convenience of my transactions. And he did, after so many rounds to the bank I finally got my work done. Suddenly to my surprise I happened to see the familiar face who was filling out some voucher there. I told him hey! doesn't that the girl looks like "Poorvi" ?( Charter name in a Kannada serial called "Muttina Torana") we see her almost 5 days in a week in one of the daily soaps... he suddenly said yes! its her... But I was bit confused as she looked bit hefty on the Television, but he asked me to wait to finish her work. She happens to be one of my favorite characters in that Kannada serial! Mom always tells me that look Poorni (me) has come, whenever Poorvi's segment would come. She believes that I relate quite a bit to Poorvi's character. Ahem! now am not gonna reveal what are the characteristics of Poorvi... and don't want to let everyone know me so candidly.

After waiting for quite a few minutes he directly went to her, whereas I was hesitating to talk to her initially. When he started to talk then I took over and did not allow him to talk at all... :) She too was glad to talk to us.. she looked as beautiful as she looks on the small screen. Pretty clean and spotless face i liked her! Here is her Pix I took with her permission. I forgot to ask her real name eew! I was so much immersed in Poorvi's role that I was calling her with the same name.! How stupid of me.. :( But actually she seemed to be quite contrast to her role.. obviously!

Here is Poorvi for you from "Muttina Torana"

I also told that My mom likes her role and her a lot.. she was joyed to hear that, finally we wished her and left the Bank with great joy! I know its not a great thing happened with me, you can spot plenty of small screen actors in the place I live. But, its nice feeling if you see your favorite actors and talk to them, click pictures with them.. its all fun to me at least... :)

Soon after coming out of the Bank I could not wait to ring up my mom to share the joy with her. So I did call to my parents and did it, they too seemed happy and asked to get the pictures next time I visit them.

Soon after that he turned his bike towards a theatre to watch the latest movie " Maleyali Joteyali" ( English Version for Non Kannadigas-- "Together in Rain" ) starring Ganesh - a popular Kannada movie actor .

Movie Posters of "Maleyali Joteyali"

Unfortunately it was sad and disappointing to me.. :( but the fun part is that he got the tickets in black because all were sold out as it had released the day before. After sometime he looked at his tickets and found three instead of two! we were thinking for sometime to what to do with that extra ticket, he tried to resell it to a lady who was still selling in black. For the first time I saw a lady selling tickets in Black outside any theater... she heatedly refused to take it. Then he tried his luck with another guy selling the tickets there. It worked! and we were in profit!!! yeah good job there!!! that was really fun! I told him that in this recession season we can take up this business of selling tickets in Black... ;)

Hey! one thing I forgot to mention that it was an "Ekadashi Day" (Holy Fasting day for Hindus). We were just trying to keep the fast for a change and test our selves as how long can we sustain the hunger. It went all well till we reached the cinema Hall. There slowly he started to crib about food, he got Corns first, then Pop Corns, Coca- Cola, Ice cream... Huh! I kept on reminding him about the fasting he kept on getting eatables.. :( this is how we both fast... After returning from Movie with bit of headache, we just rested for a while at home and in the evening I asked him to take me to ISCKON, coz I wanted to buy some posters of Sri Srinivasa Govinda Perumal, (Nothing but Lord Tirupati) that's what my colleague had asked me to get it from ISCKON, with great difficulty I got them... yuppy!

Now that he already bought some cake, sweet bread and spicy bread and also some Butter biscuits for the guests visiting us the next day in our home. Got some hot nice Ekadashi Prasadam to eat, we ate that cake as well. He again started feeling hungry. There is a canteen in the temple itself, and was in dilemma whether to go there or not, I kept on reminding him about our fasting and he kept on hunting for the food... :( then gave him a tough choice saying that if we are eating in the canteen then I'm not gonna cook at home. But, he was badly wanting the Palak (Spinach) Parathas which I was going to prepare at night. poor thing.. :) Somehow he finally decided to eat in that canteen itself and postponed of preparing parathas the next day. I was happy coz I was saved from cooking at home..yeah!

Now that we deiced to eat there, he again started to crib about what to eat, whereas certain items are prohibited to eat on that day... I said dude! do you really think we are fasting? he ignored me.. and ordered some Appam, Idiappam (Some Kerala food items) and an Organic Dosa.... My God! we managed to finish them and he was still not full.. I got pissed out and strictly said NO MORE EATING NOW! Then helplessly he had to agree with me and went back home had some fruits and buttermilk and went to sleep..... zzz

I recently realized that one can write out something if one is really sad or pissed out in life.. or struggling out. Yes, its true if there is no struggle then there is no fun in achieving what we want to and this keeps us going! That's why we had so much lovely songs in olden days... I love to be sad and feel doomed out.. so that my mind churns out and comes up with nice words to put on to my blog... PHEW!

तेरी याद!

याद तुम इतना न आया करो,
की मैं ख़ुद को भूल जाया करू |

तुम्हारी याद इस कदर आती हैं,
जैसे तूफ़ान आकर अपने साथ सब ले जाती हैं |

तुम्हे चाहे हम इस तरह,
बता न सके किस तरह |

तुम हो तो सब कुछ हैं,
नही तो सिर्फ़ फुरकत हैं |

आजाओ तुम जल्दी से,
की रहा न जाय जिन्दा मर्जी से |

खिला चेहरा तुम्हारा सामने आता हैं हर वक्त,
जैसे तुम्हारी याद आती हैं बेवक्त |

कही मार न दे मुझे तेरी याद,
क्या तुम्हे भी आती हैं कभी मेरी याद ?

हर बार सोचा की तुम्हे याद न करेंगे अब के बाद,
पर दिल ने इसको टाला बार बार |

क्या करे ये समझ न आए,
तेरी याद मुझे छोड़ न पाये |

- पूर्णिमा, २००३

All these days I felt that my "Sun" of "Life" was covered with thick "Cloud" of "Sadness" . Now that all the clouds moved away and now I can see things clearly and more brightly... My vision is bit cleared... :) " that's why its said " Every Cloud Has a Silver Lining"........ :))))))

My Love

Thousands and thousands of miles away,
In a place called Shanghai, where he stay;

Who is so dear to me,
that His separation is not bearable by me;

My heart always craved to be his dear,
When we were studying together;

He is now settled there with good job,
But my heart is not still out of his cob;

He is such a good guy,
that nobody can say to him good-bye;

He talks to me so many times,
But never says that am the reason for his smiles;

My love for him nobody can smell,
As I have kept him in my heart like a pearl in the shell;

He's ray of hope of my life,
As, I want to be his wife;

How should I tell him that he is my passion,
And not a friend for fashion;

He's my life's pilot,
As, the blood is  for a sinking patient;

My love for him will never peter-out,
Till I pass-out!

-Poornima
- Thursday, 28th July 2005; 12:30pm

Finally got "Spotted" for my effort at work.. feeling good good.. :)) But somewhere in my heart am feeling that this should not be a nice way of saying that we are laying you off.. :) as very soon we are gonna get the list of people being laid off.... huh! as always i feel that my glass is always half empty!

oh Jesus save me please... amen...

PG ದಿನಗಳು...

ಅಂತು ಇಂತೂ PG ಬಂತು...sss ಎಂಬ remix ಹಾಡು ನಾನು ಜೋಡಿಸಿದೆ. PG ಅಂದರೆ Post Graduate ಅಲ್ಲಾ, Paying Guest ಅಂತ. PGನಲ್ಲಿನ ಒಂದು ಚಿಕ್ಕ ಅನುಭವ ಇಲ್ಲಿದೆ ಓದಿ. "ರೋಗಿ ಬಯಸಿದ್ದು ಹಾಲು ಅನ್ನ, ವೈದ್ಯರು ಹೇಳಿದ್ದು ಹಾಲು ಅನ್ನ" ಎಂಬ ಗಾದೆ ನನಗೆ ಈ ಸಮಯದಲ್ಲಿ ತುಂಬ ಅನ್ವೈಸುತ್ತದೆ. ನನ್ನ ಅತ್ತೆ ಮಾವರೊಂದಿಗೆ ಸರಿಹೋಗದೆ ಇರುವುದು, ಕೆಲಸ ಸಿಕ್ಕು ದೂರ ಹೋಗಬೇಕೆಂಬ ನನ್ನ ಆಸೆ, ಎಲ್ಲವೂ ನಡೆದುದಕ್ಕೆ ವಳಿತೇ ಆಯಿತು. ಅದಕ್ಕೆ ಅನಿಸುತ್ತೆ "ಎಲ್ಲವೂ ಆಗುವದು ವಳ್ಳೀತಕ್ಕೆ ಎಂಬ ಮಾತು ನಿಜ... ನನಗು PGಅಲ್ಲಿ ಇರುವ ಅನುಭವ ಅವಶ್ಯವಿತ್ತು ಅನಿಸುತ್ತೆ. ಒಟ್ಟಿನಲ್ಲಿ ಅತ್ತೆ ಮಾವನ ಕಾಟ ಹಾಗು ಮಂಕು ಗಂಡನ ತಲೆ ನೋವು ಬಿಟ್ಟು ಈ PGಗೆ ಬಂದಾಯಿತು. ಇದು ನನಗೆ ಕನಸಿನಲ್ಲೂ ಅಂದುಕೊಂಡಿರದ ಸಂಗತಿ.

PGಗೆ ಬಂದ ಕೂಡಲೇ ನನ್ನ ಮನಸ್ಸಿಗೆ ಯಾಕೋ ಕಸಿವಿಸಿ ಏನೋ ಕಳೆದುಕೊಂಡ ಭಾವ, ಮುಂದೆ ಏನು ಎ೦ದು ಒಂದೆಡೆ ಇದ್ದರೆ, ನನ್ನ ಜೀವನದ ಅಮೂಲ್ಯ ಕ್ಷಣಗಳನ್ನ ಬಲಿ ಕೊಟ್ಟ ಭಾವ ಇನ್ನೊಂದು ಕಡೆ. ಈ ನನ್ನ ದ್ವಂದ್ವ ಮನಸ್ಸಿನ ಸ್ಥಿತಿ ನನಗೇನು ಹೊಸದಲ್ಲ. ಆದರೂ ಮದುವೆ ಮಾಡಿಕೊಂಡು ನಾನೇನು ಸುಖ ಪಡಲಿಲ್ಲ, ನನ್ನಿಂದ ನನ್ನ ಹೆತ್ತವರಿಗೂ ಸಂತಸ ಸಿಗಲಿಲ್ಲ. ಬಹುಷಃ ಇದು ನನ್ನ ಪೂರ್ವ ಜನ್ಮದ ಪಾಪ ಕರ್ಮಗಳೆನಿಸುತ್ತದೆ. ಯಾಕೆಂದರೆ ಈ ಜನ್ಮದಲ್ಲಿ ನಾನು ಯಾರಿಗೂ ದ್ರೋಹ ಬಗೆದಿಲ್ಲವೆಂದ ಮೇಲೆ ಇದು ನನ್ನ ಪೂರ್ವ ಜನ್ಮದ ಕರ್ಮವೇ ಸರಿ ಎನಿಸುತ್ತದೆ.

ನನ್ನವರು ನನಗೆ PGಗೆ ತಲುಪಿಸಲು ಬಂದಾಗ ಕಣ್ತುಂಬ ನೀರು ತುಂಬಿಕೊಂಡಿದ್ದರು. ನನಗೆ ಅದು ನಿಜವೋ ನಾಟಕವೋ ತಿಳಿಯಲಿಲ್ಲ. ಆದರೆ ಅದನ್ನು ನಿಜ ಎಂದು ನಂಬಲು ಆಸೆ. ಆದರೆ ನಾನು "ಆಸೆಯೇ ದುಖ್ಹಕ್ಕೆ ಮೂಲ" ಎಂಬುದೂ ಮರೆತಿರಲಿಲ್ಲ. ಅವರ ದುಖ್ಹ ನೋಡಿ ಮನಸ್ಸಿಗೆ ತುಂಬಾ ಬೇಜಾರ್ ಆಯಿತು. ಆದರೆ ಒoದೆಡೆ ಪಂಜರದಿಂದ ಹೊರ ಬಂದ ಪಕ್ಷಿಯ ರೀತಿ ಮನಸ್ಸಿನ ಸ್ಥಿತಿ ಇತ್ತು. ಅವರು ತಮ್ಮ ಕೆಲಸದ ಸಲುವಾಗಿ ತುಂಬಾ ದಿನಗಳ ಮಟ್ಟಿಗೆ ಊರಿಂದ ಹೊರಗೆ ಹೋಗಬೇಕಾಗಿ ಬಂದದ್ದೆ ತಡ, ಧಿಡಿರನೆ PGಗೆ ಬರುವ ನಿರ್ಧಾರ ತೆಗೆದುಕೊಂಡೆ. ಅದಕ್ಕೆ ನನ್ನವರು ಹೇಳ್ತಾರೆ... ನೀನು ನನ್ನ ಪರಿಸ್ಥಿತಿಯನ್ನು ದುರುಪಯೋಗ ಪದೆಸಿಕೊಂಡೆ ಅಂತ. ಏಕೆಂದರೆ ನಾನು ಆಮೇಲೆ ಮರಳಿ ಅತ್ತೆ ಮನೆಗೆ ಹೋಗಲೇ ಇಲ್ಲ.

ಆದರೆ ನಂಗೇನು ತಿಳಿದಿತ್ತು "ಪಾಪಿ ಸಮುದ್ರಕ್ಕೆ ಹೋದರು ಮೊಣಕಾಲಷ್ಟೇ ನೀರು" ಅನ್ನೋ ಹಾಗೆ ಆಯಿತು. ಸ್ವಲ್ಪ ದಿನ ಎಲ್ಲ ಚೆನ್ನಾಗಿ ಅನಿಸುತ್ತಿತ್ತು. ಇದರ ಅರಿವು ಇದ್ದರೂ ಮನೆಯ ಉದ್ವಿಗ್ನ ವಾತಾವರಣದಲ್ಲಿ ಮರೆತಿರಬೇಕು ನನ್ನ ಮನಸ್ಸು. ಮನೆಯಗಿಂತ ಎಷ್ಟೋ ವಾಸಿ ಅನಿಸುತ್ತಿತ್ತು.

ಹಾಳಾದ್ದು ನನಗೆ ಆ fan ಇಲ್ಲದಿದ್ದರೆ ನಿದ್ದೆನೇ ಬರೋದಿಲ್ಲ. ಚಿಕ್ಕಂದಿನಿಂದಲೂ fanನಿನ ಅಭ್ಯಾಸ. ಆದ್ದರಿಂದ ಯಾರ ಮನೆಗೆ ಹೋಗುವ ಮುನ್ನ ಅವರ ಮನೆಯಲ್ಲಿ fan ಇದೆಯೋ ಇಲ್ಲವೋ ಅಂತ ಖಚಿತ ಪಡೆಸಿಕೊಂಡೆ ಹೋಗೋದು. ಹಾಗೆ ಬೆಳೆದವಳು ನಾನು. Fan ಇಲ್ಲದಿದ್ದರೆ ಉಸಿರೇ ನಿಂತ ಹಾಗೆ ಆಗುತ್ತೆ. ಇದೇ ನಾನಿದ್ದ PG room ಅಲ್ಲಿ ಜಗಳಕ್ಕೆ ಕಾರಣವಾದದ್ದು. ಒಬ್ಬಳಿಗೆ fan ಇದ್ದರೆ ಅಲರ್ಜಿ, ಇನ್ನೊಬ್ಬಳಿಗೆ ಇಲ್ಲದ್ದಿದ್ದರೆ ಅಲರ್ಜಿ. ವತ್ಟ್ನಲ್ಲಿ fanನಿನ funda ಆಯಿತು. Fan ನಿಂತ ಕ್ಷಣ ಎಲ್ಲರ ಜೊತೆ ಮಾತು ನಿಂತು ಹೋಯಿತು. ಸ್ಫೂರ್ತಿ, ಮಧುಮಿತ ತುಂಬಾ ಜೋರು. ಅವರ ಜೊತೆ ಸೇರಿ ಶ್ವೇತಾನೂ ಹಾಗೆ ಅವರ ಜೊತೆಗೂಡಿದಳು. ಕೊನೆಗೆ ನನಗೆ ಪ್ರಾಣ ಸಂಕಟ ಆಯಿತು. ಬಹುಷಃ ನನ್ನ ಅವರ ನಡುವಿನ ಭಾವನೆಗಳ, ವಯಸ್ಸಿನ ಅಂತರವೇ ಕಾರಣ ಅಯಿತೋ ಏನೋ ನಮ್ಮ ಭಿನ್ನಾಭಿಪ್ರಾಯಕ್ಕೆ. ನಾನು ಯಾವತ್ತು ಇದರ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ತಲೆ ಕೆಡೆಸಿ ಕೊಂಡಿದ್ದೇ ಇಲ್ಲ. ಆದರೆ ನನ್ನ ಒಂಟಿತನ ಇನ್ನೂ ಹೆಚ್ಚಿತು.

ನನ್ನ ಬಾಲ್ಯ ಸ್ನೇಹಿತೆ ಕೂಡ ಅವಳ ಅಮ್ಮನ ಮನೆಗೆ ಹೋಗಿದ್ದಳು. ಅವಳು ಅಲ್ಲೇ ಪಕ್ಕದ room ಅಲ್ಲೇ ಇರುತ್ತಿದ್ದಳು. ಅವಳಿಗೂ ಪಾಪ ತುಂಬಾ ತೊಂದರೆಗಳಿದ್ದವು. ಜೀವನದಲ್ಲಿ ತುಂಬಾ ನೋವು ತಿಂದಿದ್ದಳು. ಅವಳು ನಾನು ತುಂಬಾ ಅನ್ನ್ಯೋನ್ನ್ಯವಾಗಿದ್ದೆವು. ಅದೇ ಮನಸ್ಸಿಗೆ ಸ್ವಲ್ಪ ಸಮಾಧಾನವಿತ್ತು. ಅವಳಿಗೂ ನನ್ನ roommatesಗಳ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಚನ್ನಾಗಿಗೊತ್ತಿತ್ತು. ಈಡಿ PGಗೆ ನನ್ನ roommates ಜಗಳಕ್ಕೆ famous ಇದ್ದದ್ದು ನನಗೆ ಆಮೇಲೆ ತಿಳೀತು. ನನ್ನ ಒಂಟಿತನ ನನ್ನ ಬೆನ್ನು ಬಿಡಲ್ಲಿಲ್ಲ... ಕೆಲಸ ಚನ್ನಾಗಿದೆ, ಆದರೆ ಮನಸ್ಸು ಚೆನ್ನಾಗಿಲ್ಲ. ಮನಸಿದ್ದರೆ ಎಲ್ಲಾ ಚೆನ್ನ. ಮನಸಿದ್ದರೆ ಈ ಜಗತ್ತು. ನನ್ನ ಮನಸ್ಸು ಇನ್ನೂ ಏನೋ ಹುಡುಕಾಟದಲ್ಲಿಯೇ ಇದೆ. ಅದು ಏನು ಅಂತ ಇನ್ನೂ ತಿಳಿದಿಲ್ಲ. ಹೀಗೆ ನನ್ನ friend ತನ್ನ ಅನಿಸಿಕೆ ನನ್ನೊಂದಿಗೆ ಹಂಚಿಕೊಂಡಳು. ಈ ಜೀವನ ಏನು ಅನ್ನೋದು ಬಹುಶ ಯಾರಿಗೂ ಇನ್ನೂ ತಿಳಿದಿಲ್ಲ ಪಾಪ ಇನ್ನು ನೀನು ನೊಂದ ಹೆಣ್ಣು ಇನ್ನೂ ನಿನಗೇನು ತಿಳಿದಿತ್ತು ಬಿಡು ಅಂದೆ...